Squirrel’s Search for Love; Helping Children Navigate Grief and Loss

Grief is one of the most profound experiences a child can face, yet it is also one of the least spoken about. Adults often try to protect children from the realities of death and loss, believing they are too young to understand or too fragile to cope. However, research consistently shows that even very young children are aware of death, curious about it and deeply affected by it when it touches their lives (Danielson & Colman, 2024). My first ever children’s book, Squirrel’s Search for Love, was written for my granddaughter in the knowledge that she may not know me for very long. Faced with a life limiting cancer, I wanted to create something that was a gentle, beautiful story to help her explore feelings of loss, love and connection in a safe and nurturing way. I also wanted her to know that I was thinking about her, even though I was no longer there! The book was not just about leaving a legacy, but was also about being dynamically healing and trauma sensitive.

Stories have long been used to help children make sense of the world. Where there is grief and loss, stories become even more essential. The use of books for emotional and psychological support has been shown to help children express feelings, understand difficult concepts, and feel less alone (Thomas‑Adams, 2015).

Shared reading is powerful and can provide emotional validation where children meet characters who are experiencing emotions similar to their own, which can help them recognise that their feelings are normal and shared (United Through Reading, 2024).

Books provide a language for that which cannot be spoken, using metaphors and images, children are supported to articulate what they feel. Books can arguably be places of safety that allow children to encounter all sorts of themes in a gentle and contained way. They can ask questions, revisit pages and process at their own pace. Stories can show that grief, while painful, can coexist with love and memories.

Squirrel’s Search for Love meets these needs with tenderness and care. The story follows a young squirrel who, after losing someone dear, sets out to find where love goes when someone dies. Along the way, Squirrel encounters other various parts of nature that are explored for whether the love is carried within these parts.

This book is to be shared. Whether you are a parent, carer, teacher or practitioner, Squirrel’s Search for Love offers a gentle, research‑informed resource to support children through one of life’s most difficult experiences. It is a story of love, loss and the enduring connections that shape us. The illustrations have been beautifully developed and created by Play Therapist Fiona Holiday.

Grief is not something that children should navigate alone. Using ‘story’, we can help them feel seen, understood and held as they make sense of the difficult experience of loss.

References

Danielson, K., & Colman, H. (2024). Supporting children through grief: A content analysis of picture books about death. Early Childhood Education Journal, 52, 1413–1422.

Thomas‑Adams, H. (2015). Child life specialists’ use of bibliotherapy with grieving children: How books can be used to aid emotional expression, meaning‑making and healing (Master’s thesis). Mills College.

United Through Reading. (2024). Five ways to use books to help children navigate grief and loss.